Note: As annoying as I find Jacob's recaps, I am pleased to find I can wholly endorse his "recaplets." Visit TWOP here to read his recaplet for this episode.
First aired: June 14, 2009
Sam, with the bag o' money, hears the screaming and joins Sookie, Tara, and Andy. We see more of the legs; looks like the body is wearing a skirt, so it's less likely to be Lafayette. Tara suggests calling the cops, and Andy points out that he is the cops. The body is really dead, having had its heart removed through a large gaping hole in its chest; Tara recognizes the body as that of the exorcist/pharmacist. And screams again. The title sequence rolls.
The rest of the cops have now arrived at the scene and set up yellow tape and flashing lights. Sookie mind-reads, in addition to Andy's mental grumbling, that Tara is lying to a police officer about knowing the victim. She concentrates and blocks out the mental noise.
The sheriff arrives; Andy lets him know that the body is in full rigor mortis, indicating that it was placed in his car in the past four hours while he was at the bar. The sheriff, noting Andy's drunkenness, diplomatically suggests he call it a night, and Andy gets real pissed at being called "overworked."
Sam and Sookie discuss how murder sucks, and Sookie describes the latest as sadistic in nature, unlike Rene's crimes, which were motivated by anger. She then confronts Tara about knowing the dead women, and Tara identifies her as the exorcist. Sookie encourages her to do the right thing, and Tara goes do just that, albeit reluctantly, knowing how it might affect her recovering alcoholic mother.
Bill Compton is laying down the laws for his protegee, which include being in bed by 4 am, not hunting people, and separating the bottle and paper recycling (awesome.) He's interrupted by his cell phone (which the brat envies.) It's Sookie alluding to what's happened. Bill and the brat have a very father-brat exchange about his girlfriend coming over, and he sends her upstairs to clean up her "slattern" look.
Jason, half-naked and with a highlighter in hand, sits in bed reading Fellowship of the Sun literature, looking very convinced that vampires are minions of Satan. He thinks about his dead psycho girlfriend and is sad.
The police officers, in light of Tara's previous description of the naked lady and the pig, are skeptical about the exorcism and the "voodoo bus." Andy is particularly belligerent about it; he must miss Jason. The sheriff pulls him aside and reminds him that Andy himself could be a suspect. Tara's mother bursts in, and is very upset about "Miss Jeanette." Tara, for some reason, takes this moment to tell her mother about Miss Jeanette being a scam, because it's always a good idea to destroy a substance abuser's belief in their treatment.
We next hear creepy music and four rather miserable people hunched on the ground in a dungeony setting. They wear collars and chains, and one of them, who is Lafayette, is thirsty enough to try drinking dripping sewage. Another, who is an old man, mutters something, and they all get up and start turning a big gear, although most can't stand; it turns out this is just to turn the device they're all locked to so the old guy can get to the toilet. A man with a bag over his head, protesting his ignorance, is brought down to join them -- he turns out to be one of the homophobe bar patrons, and recognizes Lafayette.
Bill and Sookie are hugging while she relates the events of the evening; he tries to tell her about the brat, but she interrupts him with smooching, so that they are in turn interrupted by the brat, wearing a towel.
Tara apologizes to her mother, who won't believe Miss Jeanette was a fraud due to her own recovery. Instead, she turns nasty-Christian, and warns Tara that her faith was tested and found wanting, and the evil that claimed Miss Jeanette may come for her, too. Right on cue, Maryann arrives; I don't know whether they are simply alluding to her evilness again, or implying that Maryann is responsible for Miss Jeannette's murder. Maryann and Tara embrace, raising her mother's eyebrows, and Tara perfunctorily introduces them before heading for the car. Maryann stays behind, though, and rips Tara's mother a new one for not standing by her daughter.
Sookie questions Bill about the vampire-turning business, about which she is not thrilled, and Bill actually has the gall to point out it's his punishment for killing Sookie's vampire attacker, which the brat loves. The brat gets sent to bed, and Sookie is a bit ticked about Bill not telling her things earlier. She goes on about trust a bit, leaves, and their relationship appears to be on the rocks.
Baby-faced preacher is on the TV debating the head vampire politico, and claims she knows who killed his family. As his TV appearance ends, his pastel-clad blonde wife joins him and mentions her political ambitions for him. They walk into a banquet, hobnob a bit, and Jason is introduced to them by the old white guy from the jail, whose name is Maury. Jason waxes enthusiastic, and Maury suggests him for this evangelist training program, er, leadership conference they've got, which only costs $1200. The preacher and his wife suggest that God will provide.
Sam shows up at Maryann's with the bag o' money, and it turns out the butler isn't mute after all. Jacob is shown into an art-filled room, and an abstract human figure draws his attention. We see a flashback to him as a puppy, running towards a mansion. He goes inside and shifts back to teenager, finds a food-laden table and starts chowing down. He starts stealing a bunch of stuff, and tries stealing the same figurine he's looking at in the present. Maryann walks in, menacingly, and wonders where his clothes are. Back in the present, the butler informs him that Maryann is still asleep, and Sam leaves a vague message for her before leaving.
Sookie eats some cereal and orange juice, then goes up to her grandmother's room and cries over some unfinished knitting. She starts going through her grandmother's things, giving herself a nasty cardboard cut in the process. The bell rings.
Sookie lets in a old guy in a suit and bow tie, who she recognizes from when she was settling her grandmother's estate. He breaks the news that her great-uncle is dead, washed up on the riverbank. Sookie, suspicious, asks about marks on the body, but it seems fish ate most of the flesh anyway. Additionally, he left his assets, totaling 11k, to her, which she accepts with a shaking hand. There's some red on the envelope, I suppose from her cut thumb.
Maryann sits by the pool with Tara and Eggs, eating fruit and smoking pot, admiring a large piece of artwork depicting Pan and a woman having sex. Tara implies Maryann may have been a tad hard on her mother, which Maryann dismissing to get more papaya. Tara and Eggs then have a conversation in which is established the following: Eggs has not had sex with Maryann. He has seen many dead bodies. They almost kiss, but are interrupted by the creepy butler, and Tara leaves for work. Maryann summons her butler and knocks him down, saying, "Nobody needed towels!"
Jason and Hoyt's minds are boggled by Rene, then Jason tells Hoyt about the Fellowship of the Sun. Hoyt's heard of them and is not thrilled; then Sookie shows up to tell Jason about the great-uncle and the inheritance, which she wants Jason to have. Now he can go the leadership conference, yay.
Sam is having another flashback, in which he has sex with Maryann and she vibrates and chants in a deep voice in not-English while holding her arms over her head in a manner reminiscent of the figurine. Arlene breaks his reverie, demanding the hire of another waitress, and has in fact brought a prospect, Daphne, along with her.
The dungeon folks, two of whom are gone, are turning the big gear again, even though none of them have to use the toilet. Lafayette bemoans his lot in life. The homophobe starts confessing his particularly white trash sins to Lafayette, and they sort of warm up a bit to each other.
Andy is questioning random patrons at Merlotte's about Miss Jeanette, and the wait staff bemoan Jason and Hoyt's respectively God-driven and weight-loss-driven temperance. A slutty woman propositions Jason, but he's apparently become abstinent in more ways than one. Some bar patrons theorize that Rene was posthumously turned into a vampire, which upsets Arlene. Terry refunds their money from his own pocket and kicks them out, getting a hug from Arlene in return.
Jason tells his sister about the leadership conference, but lies about the church. They miss their grandmother. Andy wants to talk to Jason, and Sookie returns to the bar, where a pink and purple square dance is taking place.
Bill is forcing the brat to try all the varieties of synthetic blood, all of which she says she hates.
Sam is drinking beer on the steps of his trailer when Sookie goes to ask him if she can take off early. He is super grouchy when she talks about Bill, which prompts an apology on her part, of the "never meant to hurt you" variety. Sam is still grouchy, and is "tired of charrin' [his] ass on [her] back burner."
Andy is gruffly interrogating an ancient couple having dinner, when he is taken to task by a dour-looking Sheriff in purple square dance attire. The Sheriff takes him off the case.
Sam has another flashback, this time to stealing clothes and jewelry while Maryann has a post-coital shower. While rummaging through her things, he comes across a drawer full of stacks of money, which he also steals. I suppose this is the same money he went to give back to her earlier, and to reinforce that implication, Maryann shows up in his trailer saying, "I think you have something of mine." He's got the heebie-jeebies, but pulls her money out and gingerly returns it. She checks it out, then creepily says, "It's not your money I want."
Meanwhile, Eggs hits on Tara at the bar and they kiss, which Sam and Maryann see.
The brat has found a particular synthetic blood type cocktail she thinks is all right, and Bill is kind of excited. Sookie arrives, sits down with the brat, and negotiates time alone with her boyfriend by promising a girl's night the next night. The brat seems to go for it, and agrees. However, as soon as she does get Bill alone, she straight-out asks him about her uncle, and Bill admits to killing him. She almost breaks up with him, but he says that although he's not sorry, he will "atone." They go upstairs and have sex/dinner, which we see more of than previously, and I can't help but think that white bedding is not a good choice for a vampire.
Back in the dungeon, we finally find out who Lafayette's captors are when Eric comes downstairs, clearly in the middle of getting his hair dyed. He takes his smock off and questions the homophobe about the vampire-killing house fire. The homophobe smashes a silver crucifix into the vampire's cheek, which is clearly painful but not at all lethal, and the vampire responds by, surprise, messily and violently killing him.
Monday, June 15, 2009
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Kings: Season 1, Episode 6
Brotherhood
First aired: June 13, 2009
Previously, on Kings: Gilboa and Gath have negotiated a peace, about which the King's brother in law, a big businessman who helped put Silas on the throne, is unhappy. Neither General Hardass nor the prince likes David, who saved the prince and was rewarded with "the best post in the military." David and Princess Michelle have previously spent some time on first base, but due to maneuvering on the part of others and a mysterious betrothal of some kind, they are currently off rather than on. The prince is worried about the prospect of David marrying his sister and outmaneuvering him for the throne.
We pan in on the king in bed, who wakes suddenly and pulls a dagger out from under his pillow. As he rises, we find that he's having a gold-hued vision of walking on leaf-covered ground in a forest. Leaves swirl around him in the air, and then he's awakened by an aide. The aide goes to shut an open window, and we see that a number of leaves have blown in on the carpet. These leaves are generally brown and oaky-looking, but exactly one green compound leaf (with opposite leaflets) lies in the middle. The king picks it up and contemplates it.
We cut to a shot of the Shiloh skyline, before joining the king and the Reverend Samuels. The king describes his vision as an omen, a phenomenon he had feared he would never experience again. The Reverend identifies the leaf as acacia, a "portent of change, of death and resurrection," and perhaps the king has been forgiven. They seem to reconcile, but Samuels warns the king that his family may be involved, and that he should be on the lookout for additional signs. They are interrupted by an ambassador of Gath, who has come to ask a favor.
General Hardass is, unsurprisingly, adamantly against helping Gath, which involves helping resolve some sort of crisis. The prince speaks up in favor of helping and volunteers to lead the mission. The king contemplates the leaf and accedes, although he wants David to tag along. The prince looks sort of not thrilled. The title sequence rolls.
In Gath, which is very monochrome and greenish, David, flanked by officials from both sides and little girls holding flowers, reassures its citizens that Gilboa is committed to peace. The king and General Hardass watch the coverage of the event, and the General calls the prince and tells him to "proceed." The prince was clearly in on something that David wasn't, and that something involves driving into the woods and rifles, which they start assembling or loading or whatever. The prince lets us know that the real mission (ordered by the king at the request of the premier of Gath) is to take out "an insurgent known as Belial."
The queen is in the midst of preparations for her own birthday celebration. She tries to draft her daughter's help, but the princess has an appointment at the hospital to check out the results of her new health care plan. The queen wishes she would find a less noble hobby.
David and the prince prepare to take out Belial, who targets civilians and seems to have a high-placed informant, with the assistance of some Gathian military men. David and the prince square off a little, but the prince wins by outranking him.
The hospital is above capacity now that people can get health care under Michelle's plan, which makes the doctors grumpy. A lady doctor acknowledges, however, that people are getting better care, and that they've quarantined a couple people (mother and son) with a contagious disease that they would have otherwise missed. The disease is a super deadly plague, but the doctors are hesitant to create panic on only "preliminary results."
In the woods in Gath, David steps onto a land mine, and the quick-thinking prince stops him and rigs the mine not to explode when he steps off. Meanwhile, David stares upward through the trees at the sun, the gold hue of which penetrates the gray-green atmosphere of Gath just a tiny bit.
The general is somewhat doubtful about the mission succeeding, and, in conversation to the king, refers to saving the king's life on some earlier, similar mission. The princess barges in with doctor in tow and spills the beans about the plague. The doctor lets us know some specifics: the plague is 100% fatal and highly contagious during the first 12 hours of infection. Michelle wants the king to make an announcement, but it looks like he's not ready to do that yet.
Back to the woods. It seems our team has approached the insurgents' encampment in a manner which put them at risk of being spotted by the enemy. The prince and David sneak forward while the rest of the group remain behind some low stone walls with their guns at the ready. A guys with a gun walks out on the bridge, then hops in a truck that drives over it. Suddenly, guys with guns pop up on the bank opposite the bridge and start shooting our guys behind the stone walls. People run around, shooting at each other.
Back at the hospital, the doctor gives the good news that the infected mother and son came in contact with fairly few people in the past 12 hours, but the mother has passed away and the boy is now alone. Michelle displays her signature lack of a sense of self-preservation, and enters quarantine to hang out with the kid who's supposed to be dead soon anyway. With any luck, the kid is past the 12 hour mark.
One of the guys behind the wall has been shot, but not shot dead, and David briefly struggles to help him. The prince and David go off on their own to try and find Belial.
The grumpy doctor lets the king know it really is plague.
The prince and David spot Belial and plan to sneak in to camp via the grabbing-some-guys-and-stealing-their-clothes approach. A hooded David sneaks around enemy camp and tosses a grenade under a jeep before diving into a thankfully empty tent. (Does he think the tent offers any protection?) The jeep explodes, and there is much yelling and running around on the part of the insurgents as the prince successfully nabs Belial. In the tent, David spots some weaponry with Gilboa's butterfly insignia; he stops the prince from killing Belial, telling him, "someone on our side has been arming Belial. We need to find out who."
Michelle is still with the kid, of course; he coughs, and she leans forward, the better to soak up any stray pathogens, I suppose. The queen has arrived, and stands outside quarantine with a look of mixed anger and fear. She lets a little of her frustration loose on the king, who has just joined her, then stomps off. The king wants his daughter removed from quarantine, but the less grumpy doctor demurs. Things go a bit echoey for the king, then he decides to shut down the city.
The king hashes out the shut-down with his staff and General Hardass. He exchanges some snark with his brother-in-law, who breaks from his usual character and offers some medical resources for free.
David goes to look for a vehicle while the prince roughs up Belial. The prince rambles on a bit about coins and then wallops Belial with a metal tube that does not look like a coin wrapper. Belial does not immediately crack.
The king goes to see the Reverend Samuels in his church, which has these really, really pretty marble pools with floating votives. The king is pissed at God for sending a plague, and asks the Reverend to help him institute a 12-hour curfew. Samuels interprets the plague as a sign that the king has a traitor close to him, and advises him to "cut off the poisoned limb."
The prince takes a break from beating Belial, who goes on about Cain and Abel for a while. It seems Belial is in favor of both Gilboa and Gath falling and some new, unified nation arising in their place. He also makes some comment about the war not ending as long as someone profits from it. The prince chokes Belial some, David tries to stop him, the prince knocks him down and takes aim, and Belial makes a snotty comment.
The Reverend broadcasts the curfew announcement in mellifluous tones from his empty, but still beautifully candlelit church. He asks everyone to light a candle in the window as a sign that they're following the curfew. (This must be a great country to be a candlemaker in.)
An aide lets the king know that they've heard from David and the prince, who are heading towards the border with a living Belial in tow. General Hardass is concerned by this. The aide also lets them know about the Gilboan weapons. The aide is sent off, and the king comes to the conclusion that the traitor is his brother-in-law. General Hardass offers to assassinate the brother, but the king asks for proof of his guilt instead.
The prince moans about David saving his life in the war and preventing him from becoming a hero the easy, if kind of dead, way.
The king asks his queen why she isn't with Michelle, and she responds that he's closer to their daughter than she is, and that she doesn't want to watch her daughter die. The king then tells her about the poisoned limb business, and that he has to kill someone to save his family. She tells him to "cut," even when he warns her obliquely that it's her brother.
In the hospital, the kid goes blind, then dies. Michelle still looks healthy, if sad.
General Hardass has uncovered incriminating photos of the king's brother in law with Belial. The king gives the assassination order, and the general nods. A candle by the general suddenly goes out. The general tries to relight it, but the candle goes out again. The king raises his eyebrows. The general leaves, and we see him later giving an order over the phone to shoot anyone who approaches the border.
David and the prince pull up to the border and are shot at by a large group of Gilboan military men. They reverse crazily into the woods and jump out. Belial takes advantage of the hubbub to knock the prince down, but David shoots him and saves the prince's life, again. Now out of the car, the prince is able to make himself recognized.
The general informs the king that his brother-in-law will be dead soon and that it will be staged to look like a suicide. They briefly discuss omens, about which the general is skeptical, and the king reveals he has stayed the order to kill his brother-in-law, and that he knows, via the candle thing, that the general is the real traitor. The general, backed into a corner, reveals his dissatisfaction with the peace with Gath. The king gets the last word by stabbing him with the same dagger we saw at the beginning of the episode.
Grumpy doctor arrives and says the quarantine worked; only 10 people died, those who came in contact with the woman and boy.
Michelle, still in quarantine, takes a sample of her own blood and hands it to a heavily protected hospital worker. The queen waits around the corner.
The king sits in Samuels' church, then notices the arrival of David and the prince. He is very pleased with them, and makes them responsible for his own protection, before leaving unprotected by them. The prince notes to David that it's not easy to kill a man and that he considers himself in David's debt.
Michelle finds David in his apartment, so she's apparently clear of plague. Without saying anything, she sits beside him and they embrace in a relatively chaste manner.
Previously, on Kings: Gilboa and Gath have negotiated a peace, about which the King's brother in law, a big businessman who helped put Silas on the throne, is unhappy. Neither General Hardass nor the prince likes David, who saved the prince and was rewarded with "the best post in the military." David and Princess Michelle have previously spent some time on first base, but due to maneuvering on the part of others and a mysterious betrothal of some kind, they are currently off rather than on. The prince is worried about the prospect of David marrying his sister and outmaneuvering him for the throne.
We pan in on the king in bed, who wakes suddenly and pulls a dagger out from under his pillow. As he rises, we find that he's having a gold-hued vision of walking on leaf-covered ground in a forest. Leaves swirl around him in the air, and then he's awakened by an aide. The aide goes to shut an open window, and we see that a number of leaves have blown in on the carpet. These leaves are generally brown and oaky-looking, but exactly one green compound leaf (with opposite leaflets) lies in the middle. The king picks it up and contemplates it.
We cut to a shot of the Shiloh skyline, before joining the king and the Reverend Samuels. The king describes his vision as an omen, a phenomenon he had feared he would never experience again. The Reverend identifies the leaf as acacia, a "portent of change, of death and resurrection," and perhaps the king has been forgiven. They seem to reconcile, but Samuels warns the king that his family may be involved, and that he should be on the lookout for additional signs. They are interrupted by an ambassador of Gath, who has come to ask a favor.
General Hardass is, unsurprisingly, adamantly against helping Gath, which involves helping resolve some sort of crisis. The prince speaks up in favor of helping and volunteers to lead the mission. The king contemplates the leaf and accedes, although he wants David to tag along. The prince looks sort of not thrilled. The title sequence rolls.
In Gath, which is very monochrome and greenish, David, flanked by officials from both sides and little girls holding flowers, reassures its citizens that Gilboa is committed to peace. The king and General Hardass watch the coverage of the event, and the General calls the prince and tells him to "proceed." The prince was clearly in on something that David wasn't, and that something involves driving into the woods and rifles, which they start assembling or loading or whatever. The prince lets us know that the real mission (ordered by the king at the request of the premier of Gath) is to take out "an insurgent known as Belial."
The queen is in the midst of preparations for her own birthday celebration. She tries to draft her daughter's help, but the princess has an appointment at the hospital to check out the results of her new health care plan. The queen wishes she would find a less noble hobby.
David and the prince prepare to take out Belial, who targets civilians and seems to have a high-placed informant, with the assistance of some Gathian military men. David and the prince square off a little, but the prince wins by outranking him.
The hospital is above capacity now that people can get health care under Michelle's plan, which makes the doctors grumpy. A lady doctor acknowledges, however, that people are getting better care, and that they've quarantined a couple people (mother and son) with a contagious disease that they would have otherwise missed. The disease is a super deadly plague, but the doctors are hesitant to create panic on only "preliminary results."
In the woods in Gath, David steps onto a land mine, and the quick-thinking prince stops him and rigs the mine not to explode when he steps off. Meanwhile, David stares upward through the trees at the sun, the gold hue of which penetrates the gray-green atmosphere of Gath just a tiny bit.
The general is somewhat doubtful about the mission succeeding, and, in conversation to the king, refers to saving the king's life on some earlier, similar mission. The princess barges in with doctor in tow and spills the beans about the plague. The doctor lets us know some specifics: the plague is 100% fatal and highly contagious during the first 12 hours of infection. Michelle wants the king to make an announcement, but it looks like he's not ready to do that yet.
Back to the woods. It seems our team has approached the insurgents' encampment in a manner which put them at risk of being spotted by the enemy. The prince and David sneak forward while the rest of the group remain behind some low stone walls with their guns at the ready. A guys with a gun walks out on the bridge, then hops in a truck that drives over it. Suddenly, guys with guns pop up on the bank opposite the bridge and start shooting our guys behind the stone walls. People run around, shooting at each other.
Back at the hospital, the doctor gives the good news that the infected mother and son came in contact with fairly few people in the past 12 hours, but the mother has passed away and the boy is now alone. Michelle displays her signature lack of a sense of self-preservation, and enters quarantine to hang out with the kid who's supposed to be dead soon anyway. With any luck, the kid is past the 12 hour mark.
One of the guys behind the wall has been shot, but not shot dead, and David briefly struggles to help him. The prince and David go off on their own to try and find Belial.
The grumpy doctor lets the king know it really is plague.
The prince and David spot Belial and plan to sneak in to camp via the grabbing-some-guys-and-stealing-their-clothes approach. A hooded David sneaks around enemy camp and tosses a grenade under a jeep before diving into a thankfully empty tent. (Does he think the tent offers any protection?) The jeep explodes, and there is much yelling and running around on the part of the insurgents as the prince successfully nabs Belial. In the tent, David spots some weaponry with Gilboa's butterfly insignia; he stops the prince from killing Belial, telling him, "someone on our side has been arming Belial. We need to find out who."
Michelle is still with the kid, of course; he coughs, and she leans forward, the better to soak up any stray pathogens, I suppose. The queen has arrived, and stands outside quarantine with a look of mixed anger and fear. She lets a little of her frustration loose on the king, who has just joined her, then stomps off. The king wants his daughter removed from quarantine, but the less grumpy doctor demurs. Things go a bit echoey for the king, then he decides to shut down the city.
The king hashes out the shut-down with his staff and General Hardass. He exchanges some snark with his brother-in-law, who breaks from his usual character and offers some medical resources for free.
David goes to look for a vehicle while the prince roughs up Belial. The prince rambles on a bit about coins and then wallops Belial with a metal tube that does not look like a coin wrapper. Belial does not immediately crack.
The king goes to see the Reverend Samuels in his church, which has these really, really pretty marble pools with floating votives. The king is pissed at God for sending a plague, and asks the Reverend to help him institute a 12-hour curfew. Samuels interprets the plague as a sign that the king has a traitor close to him, and advises him to "cut off the poisoned limb."
The prince takes a break from beating Belial, who goes on about Cain and Abel for a while. It seems Belial is in favor of both Gilboa and Gath falling and some new, unified nation arising in their place. He also makes some comment about the war not ending as long as someone profits from it. The prince chokes Belial some, David tries to stop him, the prince knocks him down and takes aim, and Belial makes a snotty comment.
The Reverend broadcasts the curfew announcement in mellifluous tones from his empty, but still beautifully candlelit church. He asks everyone to light a candle in the window as a sign that they're following the curfew. (This must be a great country to be a candlemaker in.)
An aide lets the king know that they've heard from David and the prince, who are heading towards the border with a living Belial in tow. General Hardass is concerned by this. The aide also lets them know about the Gilboan weapons. The aide is sent off, and the king comes to the conclusion that the traitor is his brother-in-law. General Hardass offers to assassinate the brother, but the king asks for proof of his guilt instead.
The prince moans about David saving his life in the war and preventing him from becoming a hero the easy, if kind of dead, way.
The king asks his queen why she isn't with Michelle, and she responds that he's closer to their daughter than she is, and that she doesn't want to watch her daughter die. The king then tells her about the poisoned limb business, and that he has to kill someone to save his family. She tells him to "cut," even when he warns her obliquely that it's her brother.
In the hospital, the kid goes blind, then dies. Michelle still looks healthy, if sad.
General Hardass has uncovered incriminating photos of the king's brother in law with Belial. The king gives the assassination order, and the general nods. A candle by the general suddenly goes out. The general tries to relight it, but the candle goes out again. The king raises his eyebrows. The general leaves, and we see him later giving an order over the phone to shoot anyone who approaches the border.
David and the prince pull up to the border and are shot at by a large group of Gilboan military men. They reverse crazily into the woods and jump out. Belial takes advantage of the hubbub to knock the prince down, but David shoots him and saves the prince's life, again. Now out of the car, the prince is able to make himself recognized.
The general informs the king that his brother-in-law will be dead soon and that it will be staged to look like a suicide. They briefly discuss omens, about which the general is skeptical, and the king reveals he has stayed the order to kill his brother-in-law, and that he knows, via the candle thing, that the general is the real traitor. The general, backed into a corner, reveals his dissatisfaction with the peace with Gath. The king gets the last word by stabbing him with the same dagger we saw at the beginning of the episode.
Grumpy doctor arrives and says the quarantine worked; only 10 people died, those who came in contact with the woman and boy.
Michelle, still in quarantine, takes a sample of her own blood and hands it to a heavily protected hospital worker. The queen waits around the corner.
The king sits in Samuels' church, then notices the arrival of David and the prince. He is very pleased with them, and makes them responsible for his own protection, before leaving unprotected by them. The prince notes to David that it's not easy to kill a man and that he considers himself in David's debt.
Michelle finds David in his apartment, so she's apparently clear of plague. Without saying anything, she sits beside him and they embrace in a relatively chaste manner.
About This Blog
I have, for some time, been a huge fan of the site Television Without Pity (also known as TWOP). They offer original articles, interviews, and host forums about nearly every television show currently running, but, in my view, their greatest asset is their set of highly detailed recaps.
These recaps are written by a group of individuals, most of whom are not only thorough but witty, adding valuable insights and humorous interjections to their descriptions of episodes. I use their recaps not so much to catch up on shows I've missed (although they would be excellent for this purpose), but to compare my impressions and interpretations with those of writers I respect.
However, I've noticed a significant number of shows I enjoy (including Firefly, Battlestar Galactica, and True Blood) are recapped by an individual named Jacob, who seems to fancy himself somewhat the philosopher. His recaps are invariably laced with his personal reflections on mythology and psychology, as well as a number of highly surreal tangents. His digressions are so lengthy and so numerous that his recaps are two to three times longer than those of his compatriots.
It seems that his approach is not only tolerated, but appreciated by a number of readers, and that he's there to stay. However, there are also a number of readers who, like myself, find his philosophizing tedious and pompous. This blog is for those readers, who would like a more straightforward approach to recapping.
Not being a writer myself, I cannot provide recaps that are of as high a quality as those written by, for example, TWOP's Couch Baron. Nevertheless, I use these writers as an example, and will interject my own comments into my recaps; however, I will endeavor to present my interpretations as just that, rather than as what the characters are actually thinking or doing.
To summarize, I offer recaps of my favorite shows when they are either recapped on TWOP by Jacob, or not recapped on that website at all. Where my favorite shows are recapped on TWOP by writers I like, I link to those shows' pages on TWOP.
These recaps are written by a group of individuals, most of whom are not only thorough but witty, adding valuable insights and humorous interjections to their descriptions of episodes. I use their recaps not so much to catch up on shows I've missed (although they would be excellent for this purpose), but to compare my impressions and interpretations with those of writers I respect.
However, I've noticed a significant number of shows I enjoy (including Firefly, Battlestar Galactica, and True Blood) are recapped by an individual named Jacob, who seems to fancy himself somewhat the philosopher. His recaps are invariably laced with his personal reflections on mythology and psychology, as well as a number of highly surreal tangents. His digressions are so lengthy and so numerous that his recaps are two to three times longer than those of his compatriots.
It seems that his approach is not only tolerated, but appreciated by a number of readers, and that he's there to stay. However, there are also a number of readers who, like myself, find his philosophizing tedious and pompous. This blog is for those readers, who would like a more straightforward approach to recapping.
Not being a writer myself, I cannot provide recaps that are of as high a quality as those written by, for example, TWOP's Couch Baron. Nevertheless, I use these writers as an example, and will interject my own comments into my recaps; however, I will endeavor to present my interpretations as just that, rather than as what the characters are actually thinking or doing.
To summarize, I offer recaps of my favorite shows when they are either recapped on TWOP by Jacob, or not recapped on that website at all. Where my favorite shows are recapped on TWOP by writers I like, I link to those shows' pages on TWOP.
Saturday, June 13, 2009
True Blood: Season 1, Episode 12
You'll Be the Death of Me
First aired: November 23, 2008
We open with a shot of Jason through jail bars, dictating his will. He leaves his jacket to Hoyt, house and money to Sookie, and truck to Rene, who is listening from the other side of the bars and apparently responsible for executing said will. They exchange a few platitudes, and Jason expresses remorse for his supposed crimes.
Rene, in a misguided attempt to console him (and let the audience know, once again, who the real killer is), plays down his crimes by claiming his victims were fangbangers who would have gotten murdered eventually. Jason takes exception to the labeling of his grandmother as a fangbanger, which is strange, because he explicitly did not confess to the murder of his grandmother in the previous episode.
Sookie angrily bursts into the jail, overriding the warden's objections to letting two visitors in at once. Jason and Sookie embrace between the bars and reconcile. Sookie tells Jason to shut up and stop confessing to things, because she's "real close to finding out who the real killer is." The camera shifts focus to Rene, who's sitting in the background and soaking all this up. The title sequence rolls.
Sookie spills the details about Drew Marshall; Rene wonders internally why she hasn't gone to the cops with this information. Sookie expresses her disappointment with the police verbally (and, after all, Rene's picture is sitting in a stack of papers somewhere in the police office), and Rene looks a bit surprised by the mind-reading. Upon questioning, Sookie reveals that, although she doesn't know what Marshall looks like, she does know he's the killer from her mind-reading. We hear some more echoey thoughts from Rene that I'm not exactly able to make out.
Sookie and Jason argue some more about his supposed guilt, then Jason enlists the help of Andy to escort Sookie out. She frantically asks about the faxed headshot of Marshall, and Andy tells us what we already know; that the police don't know about the fax and that he suspects Jason.
We pan across a framed copy of La Grande Odalisque. Since this series takes place in the future, I suppose it could even be the original. The rest of the room, as we see subsequently, is black and white and looks expensive, and we see Tara wake up in it. She looks awfully happy and comfortable, then perturbed. She puts on a robe, and is served breakfast on a sunlit patio by a seemingly mute butler in a Hawaiian shirt.
Maryann joins her, and in the ensuing conversation admits that she is not just a social worker but also "many things." She avoids detailing what said things are by turning the conversation back to Tara, who is understandably abashed at being labeled a "drunk-driving bartender." She goes on to suggest Tara use this low-point in her life as an "opportunity" to cut her ties to her friends, mother, and job, and to rebuild her life. Tara half-heartedly tried to leave, saying that Maryann must have more needy people to see to, and Maryann brushes that aside and reiterates that she wants to help, specifically by giving her a place to stay until she figures things out. Meanwhile, the mute butler makes the bed and steals her phone, who Sam is trying to call.
We see Sam leaving a frustrated message back in his office at the bar, then being surprised that Sookie's shown up to work. She responds that she won't act ashamed of her brother, then, in another dose of heavy-handed dramatic irony, talks about how Marshall could be anyone in the town, even a bar regular, etc., etc. Sam wonders, reasonably, why she hasn't "heard" him, then, and she asks, also reasonably, why he hasn't smelled him with his weredog talents. She reminds him that she spends most of her time trying not to hear people, and Sam apologizes instead of explaining the smell thing.
A be-suited old white guy shows up outside Jason's jail cell, peddling "The Fellowship of the Sun," a religious group that is really against vampires. Jason reflects that he rather liked the vampire he got to know, and mentions that he got him killed so we know he's talking about Eddie, not Bill. Old white guy goes on about how vampires suck and how, while it's not technically okay to kill human women, fangbangers or no, he thinks it's kind of awesome and that the church will fund his defense. He gives Jason some literature and creepy music plays.
Back at the black-and-white mansion, Tara goes for a swim in the pool, then runs across a hot guy playing guitar in a fruit-filled room. Hot guy introduces himself as Eggs, short for Benedict, and Tara cracks up. She apologizes and offers her own name, acknowledging its lameness, and when Eggs totally doesn't get it, she first makes a squinchy face, then lets it go because he's totally hot. Hot guy already knows all about Tara's problems through Maryann, of who he is also a protege and of whose Kool-aid he has clearly drunk. He hits on her just a little, and when she displays a little skepticism about "things too good to be true," encourages her to "stop looking over [her] shoulder."
Meanwhile, Maryann sits in a chair in the yard facing her pig, eyes closed, vibrating scarily, and completely justifying any shoulder-looking.
We cut to Rene in Jason's truck, singing along to "The Devil in Disguise," which I think is this version. He takes us to Merlotte's, where Andy is defaming Jason to a crowd to the displeasure of the sheriff and Sookie, who is overwhelmed by the patrons' negative thoughts about her brother. Sam, perhaps not entirely altruistically, offers her the use of his trailer, but she claims to need to escape entirely. He objects, and she placates him by saying she'll just drive around with her car doors locked. A quick hug and she's off.
Of course, her car won't start. Surprise, surprise. Rene, accompanied by scary music, pops up and offers to take a look at her car, which he tells her he can't fix and offers to give her a ride and stay with her at home till Sam gets off. During this exchange, Terry drops by, tells Sookie he knows her brother isn't a killer, and, more importantly, witnesses Sookie and Rene together, despite Rene's dropped head. As Rene puts the hood of her car back down, we get a glimpse of cut wires.
Together in the truck, Rene makes her buckle up, even though he himself is free of seatbelt. He asks about the mindreading, and we hear him trying to think about nothing, to which Sookie responds that one can't think about nothing. She then notes that his thoughts "don't have an accent." He quickly changes the subject to how hard it must be for her to hear people's thoughts, and in yet another bit of heavy-handed dramatic irony she complains about how "sick and twisted" some people are. She cries about potentially losing her brother and he hands her a tissue.
We cut to the back of a TV, the sounds of Maudette Pickens' vampire sex tape, and the very shocked faces of Arlene's little girls. Arlene walks in on this, and Lisa, under interrogation, reveals they found it in the garage and that it's Rene's, pointing to a yellow box. Arlene opens the box, and, amidst many VCR tapes, finds a cassette labeled "Cajun Dialect for Actors" and has a look of realization.
Rene and Sookie arrive at her house. While she's preparing tea, Rene wanders through the house a bit and spots a shotgun propped against a door frame.
Back at Merlotte's, Lafayette finds Rene's work vest and tosses it to Sam, who smells it and promptly has a flashback to rolling around in Dawn's bed. He runs out, finds Terry, who relates seeing Sookie with Rene, and the plot moves on.
Rene circumnavigates the house and startles Sookie in the kitchen. Seeing the kitchen prompts a memory of him killing her grandmother (apparently, just because Sookie wasn't there, which doesn't make a whole lot of sense), and Sookie drops the tea, totally giving away that she overhears this. Rene cottons on, Sookie goes to get a mop, Rene follows. She grabs the gun, tries to shoot him, but he has had the foresight to remove the bullets. He starts to have angry yelling thoughts about fangbangers, accompanied by jerky head movements, which lets us know he is going into crazy mode. He takes off his belt and Sookie screams and hits him in the head with the gun, which knocks him down but not out. She runs off toward the woods, and I would like to take this opportunity to say that if someone is chasing you and you have the choice of where to run, this is not a good choice. The main road is better. Anyway, a chase ensues, intercut with scenes of Rene, er, Drew confronting and killing his sister and the other women. Interestingly, Rene/Drew claims that he can tell Sookie is reading his mind.
Meanwhile, Bill wakes up despite it being broad daylight, and Sam pulls up to the house. He sees Rene/Drew's blood and uses his weredog senses to track them, ripping off his shirt as he goes. Bill actually gets up and walks out into the daylight, which is really weird, because last time he thought Sookie was being killed by the same person in the same way, he stayed underground. He starts to fry in the sun.
Sookie hides in an open grave, which is so her, while Rene/Drew think-pretends to go back in the woods to look for her. She is totally fooled and starts to get up, but of course he's standing right behind her. Tip Number 2: If you do have mind-reading abilities, it is super useful not to let people know it. He gets a couple good punches in and starts to strangle her while an increasingly fried Bill zombie-walks towards them. It's Sam the collie who saves the day, knocking Rene down. Rene quickly gets the upper hand, and Sam shifts back to human once he's out. Rene is freaked out and takes a break from the strangling to kick and curse at an unconscious Sam. Bill steps into a patch of sunlight, starts frying more, and just manages to croak Sookie's name (which is good, because he's pretty unrecognizable by now) before falling down. Sookie comes to, spots a shovel, and uses it to knock down, then decapitate the bad guy, once again completely not using the telekinesis she displayed in the first couple episodes. The shovel falls down with a gross squishy sound.
In the distance, Bill's body continues to sizzle. Sookie rolls him over, exposing his face to the sun, and he actually manages to lift his head and apologize for his uselessness. Sam, on the other hand, has the presence of mind to pick him up and throw him into the open grave. He uses the very useful shovel to bury him.
Later, a bruised and drugged Sookie wakes up in her house in the presence of her friends. She tries to spill the beans about Sam's shapeshifting, but of course Tara and Lafayette assume it's the drugs talking. She continues to talk Sam up, and Tara looks uncomfortable. Arlene tromps in clumsily holding a bouquet, which she brandishes at Sookie while sobbing and squeaking. (Carrie Preston is pretty awesome in both this and her previous scene.)
Back at the police station, Sheriff Dearborne breaks the news to an blustering, indignant Andy that Rene/Drew is clearly the killer and not Jason. Andy surlily releases a surprised Jason.
Arlene is crying, pacing, apologizing to Sookie, and bemoaning her stupidity re: Rene/Drew. She begs Sookie to do a brain scan on her next beau. Finally, she asks about Bill, about whom Sookie is not optimistic. Despite the drugs, she breaks up.
Lafayette heads back to the bar, leaving Sam and Tara on the porch together. Sam mentions, pissily, that he left her five messages, and Tara says she never got them, so I guess the mute butler erased them, then gave her back her phone. Tara changes the subject and thanks him for saving Sookie. When he says he was worried about Tara, she dismisses it as he "worr[ies] about everybody," and I think she's trying to convey that she's relinquishing him to Sookie. She gives him a little kiss as Maryann pulls up in her red convertible. Tara briefly introduces them and gets in the car. Sam recognizes her, and asks what the hell she's doing there. Maryann responds evilly with "Did you think I wouldn't find you? Silly dog."
Back to Arlene, who alludes to Rene's odd proclivities in bed before Jason walks in, thrilling Sookie. He gives her a (painful) bear hug and trash talks Rene right in front of Arlene, who runs off. Jason looks slightly taken aback, but goes on to talk about being Saved and how he's meant to do something important with his life. Sookie, smiling, hope this means he's going to stay out of trouble. He claims he will, before running out, tripping over furniture along the way.
Lafayette takes out the trash, bitching about the bags other people have left lying around. Cleaning up, something rushes up out of the dark. Through the something's eyes, we see Lafayette freak out and jump up on the dumpster. The something gets very close very quickly before we abruptly cut away.
Sookie is still on her couch, watching a scene from The Little Princess in which Shirley Temple hugs her father and claims she knew he wasn't dead while the father sits there with a bandaged head and kind of looks like he has amnesia. The bell rings, and hooray, it's Bill, risen from the seeming dead. Faced by her joyful shock, he admits to having fed, which doesn't phase her in the slightest. She rescinds her rescinded invitation and they embrace. He goes to bite his wrist, but she refuses his super-healing blood, saying that after everything, she just needs "to feel human." This strikes me as a somewhat insensitive thing to say to a vampire, and indeed, he looks a bit taken aback, but maybe he's just thinking about the increased libido she won't be experiencing. He apologizes again for not saving her, which she of course does not hold him responsible for, and we have kissing. He gently kisses the bruises on her face, which is sweet, and then they go back to macking on each other. Looks like they're getting into it, so I presume Sookie has some rather painful sex.
The words "TWO WEEKS LATER" pop up; Merlotte's employees watch news coverage of Vermont legalizing human-vampire marriage (because gays are just like vampires.) Their eyes slide over to Sookie, and Arlene pokes her on the shoulder and teases that now she can marry Bill. Sookie demurs, and Sam, very cranky and snide, encourages her to marry Bill and notes how cheap the celebration would be without booze or food. Sookie storms off and Tara takes him to task, quoting Maryann in the process and thus pissing Sam off further. Sam asks if she's heard from her cousin, so I guess he's been eaten by the something from earlier (a big, supernatural pig, perhaps?). Tara is not too perturbed, since Lafayette's been known to run off before.
On the other end of the bar, Terry tries to chat up Arlene. First, he talks about how even when people disappear, "the good parts of them always stay put," which makes her smile. He strikes out, though, with "your hair's like a sunset after a bomb went off." Or at least, he seems to, but she giggles after he shamefacedly slinks away.
In a reasonably large church, a baby-faced preacher declares whatever Christians call jihad against vampires. We find Jason in the enthusiastic congregation, praising Jesus and kissing his neighbor, who is not a pretty girl.
Back at the bar, Tara tries to cut Andy off, but he incites a little sympathy in her, and she pours him another drink, calling it his "pity party." She then goes on about how it takes energy to hate people, blah blah blah. Kool-aid has been drunk.
Sookie serves Hoyt, who is looking kind of dapper and enquires after Bill. He expresses approval of their relationship and muses, only somewhat joking, on the possibility of finding a vampire girlfriend himself, perhaps through Bill. Sookie, probably considering Bill's female acquaintances, only laughs.
Bill plays a jaunty tune on a piano in his dark house, the door opens, but, much to his visible disappointment, it is not Sookie but his bratty "daughter," still bratty. Apparently, she is so very bratty that not even the incredibly repressive Eric and his female henchwoman (wearing a rather Jackie-O nubbly pale blue skirt suit, which is awesome) can manage her. They bare fangs over Sookie, henchwoman rolling her eyes, and Bill gets saddled with the brat. The brat bares her own fangs (the plasticky sound of which reminds me for the hundredth time of a Pez dispenser) and asks "who's good to eat around here." Bill looks tired.
Andy is drunk and doesn't want to give Sookie his keys. She consoles him a little and calls him "Detective Bellefleur," at which he perks up a bit. Meanwhile, Sam, looking very purposeful, transfers great stacks of money from a safe to a plastic bag. Sookie and Tara follow Andy to his car, still asking for his keys, which he says he left in his car. He finds his car stolen, but, kind of amusingly, Tara points it out just a little farther away. Of course, Andy grunts that that isn't where he left it, and it seems he's actually right, because now his car has a body in the back seat. Upon opening the back door, a black leg with painted toenails falls out, which means it's probably Lafayette. The ladies scream, which signals the end of the episode.
We open with a shot of Jason through jail bars, dictating his will. He leaves his jacket to Hoyt, house and money to Sookie, and truck to Rene, who is listening from the other side of the bars and apparently responsible for executing said will. They exchange a few platitudes, and Jason expresses remorse for his supposed crimes.
Rene, in a misguided attempt to console him (and let the audience know, once again, who the real killer is), plays down his crimes by claiming his victims were fangbangers who would have gotten murdered eventually. Jason takes exception to the labeling of his grandmother as a fangbanger, which is strange, because he explicitly did not confess to the murder of his grandmother in the previous episode.
Sookie angrily bursts into the jail, overriding the warden's objections to letting two visitors in at once. Jason and Sookie embrace between the bars and reconcile. Sookie tells Jason to shut up and stop confessing to things, because she's "real close to finding out who the real killer is." The camera shifts focus to Rene, who's sitting in the background and soaking all this up. The title sequence rolls.
Sookie spills the details about Drew Marshall; Rene wonders internally why she hasn't gone to the cops with this information. Sookie expresses her disappointment with the police verbally (and, after all, Rene's picture is sitting in a stack of papers somewhere in the police office), and Rene looks a bit surprised by the mind-reading. Upon questioning, Sookie reveals that, although she doesn't know what Marshall looks like, she does know he's the killer from her mind-reading. We hear some more echoey thoughts from Rene that I'm not exactly able to make out.
Sookie and Jason argue some more about his supposed guilt, then Jason enlists the help of Andy to escort Sookie out. She frantically asks about the faxed headshot of Marshall, and Andy tells us what we already know; that the police don't know about the fax and that he suspects Jason.
We pan across a framed copy of La Grande Odalisque. Since this series takes place in the future, I suppose it could even be the original. The rest of the room, as we see subsequently, is black and white and looks expensive, and we see Tara wake up in it. She looks awfully happy and comfortable, then perturbed. She puts on a robe, and is served breakfast on a sunlit patio by a seemingly mute butler in a Hawaiian shirt.
Maryann joins her, and in the ensuing conversation admits that she is not just a social worker but also "many things." She avoids detailing what said things are by turning the conversation back to Tara, who is understandably abashed at being labeled a "drunk-driving bartender." She goes on to suggest Tara use this low-point in her life as an "opportunity" to cut her ties to her friends, mother, and job, and to rebuild her life. Tara half-heartedly tried to leave, saying that Maryann must have more needy people to see to, and Maryann brushes that aside and reiterates that she wants to help, specifically by giving her a place to stay until she figures things out. Meanwhile, the mute butler makes the bed and steals her phone, who Sam is trying to call.
We see Sam leaving a frustrated message back in his office at the bar, then being surprised that Sookie's shown up to work. She responds that she won't act ashamed of her brother, then, in another dose of heavy-handed dramatic irony, talks about how Marshall could be anyone in the town, even a bar regular, etc., etc. Sam wonders, reasonably, why she hasn't "heard" him, then, and she asks, also reasonably, why he hasn't smelled him with his weredog talents. She reminds him that she spends most of her time trying not to hear people, and Sam apologizes instead of explaining the smell thing.
A be-suited old white guy shows up outside Jason's jail cell, peddling "The Fellowship of the Sun," a religious group that is really against vampires. Jason reflects that he rather liked the vampire he got to know, and mentions that he got him killed so we know he's talking about Eddie, not Bill. Old white guy goes on about how vampires suck and how, while it's not technically okay to kill human women, fangbangers or no, he thinks it's kind of awesome and that the church will fund his defense. He gives Jason some literature and creepy music plays.
Back at the black-and-white mansion, Tara goes for a swim in the pool, then runs across a hot guy playing guitar in a fruit-filled room. Hot guy introduces himself as Eggs, short for Benedict, and Tara cracks up. She apologizes and offers her own name, acknowledging its lameness, and when Eggs totally doesn't get it, she first makes a squinchy face, then lets it go because he's totally hot. Hot guy already knows all about Tara's problems through Maryann, of who he is also a protege and of whose Kool-aid he has clearly drunk. He hits on her just a little, and when she displays a little skepticism about "things too good to be true," encourages her to "stop looking over [her] shoulder."
Meanwhile, Maryann sits in a chair in the yard facing her pig, eyes closed, vibrating scarily, and completely justifying any shoulder-looking.
We cut to Rene in Jason's truck, singing along to "The Devil in Disguise," which I think is this version. He takes us to Merlotte's, where Andy is defaming Jason to a crowd to the displeasure of the sheriff and Sookie, who is overwhelmed by the patrons' negative thoughts about her brother. Sam, perhaps not entirely altruistically, offers her the use of his trailer, but she claims to need to escape entirely. He objects, and she placates him by saying she'll just drive around with her car doors locked. A quick hug and she's off.
Of course, her car won't start. Surprise, surprise. Rene, accompanied by scary music, pops up and offers to take a look at her car, which he tells her he can't fix and offers to give her a ride and stay with her at home till Sam gets off. During this exchange, Terry drops by, tells Sookie he knows her brother isn't a killer, and, more importantly, witnesses Sookie and Rene together, despite Rene's dropped head. As Rene puts the hood of her car back down, we get a glimpse of cut wires.
Together in the truck, Rene makes her buckle up, even though he himself is free of seatbelt. He asks about the mindreading, and we hear him trying to think about nothing, to which Sookie responds that one can't think about nothing. She then notes that his thoughts "don't have an accent." He quickly changes the subject to how hard it must be for her to hear people's thoughts, and in yet another bit of heavy-handed dramatic irony she complains about how "sick and twisted" some people are. She cries about potentially losing her brother and he hands her a tissue.
We cut to the back of a TV, the sounds of Maudette Pickens' vampire sex tape, and the very shocked faces of Arlene's little girls. Arlene walks in on this, and Lisa, under interrogation, reveals they found it in the garage and that it's Rene's, pointing to a yellow box. Arlene opens the box, and, amidst many VCR tapes, finds a cassette labeled "Cajun Dialect for Actors" and has a look of realization.
Rene and Sookie arrive at her house. While she's preparing tea, Rene wanders through the house a bit and spots a shotgun propped against a door frame.
Back at Merlotte's, Lafayette finds Rene's work vest and tosses it to Sam, who smells it and promptly has a flashback to rolling around in Dawn's bed. He runs out, finds Terry, who relates seeing Sookie with Rene, and the plot moves on.
Rene circumnavigates the house and startles Sookie in the kitchen. Seeing the kitchen prompts a memory of him killing her grandmother (apparently, just because Sookie wasn't there, which doesn't make a whole lot of sense), and Sookie drops the tea, totally giving away that she overhears this. Rene cottons on, Sookie goes to get a mop, Rene follows. She grabs the gun, tries to shoot him, but he has had the foresight to remove the bullets. He starts to have angry yelling thoughts about fangbangers, accompanied by jerky head movements, which lets us know he is going into crazy mode. He takes off his belt and Sookie screams and hits him in the head with the gun, which knocks him down but not out. She runs off toward the woods, and I would like to take this opportunity to say that if someone is chasing you and you have the choice of where to run, this is not a good choice. The main road is better. Anyway, a chase ensues, intercut with scenes of Rene, er, Drew confronting and killing his sister and the other women. Interestingly, Rene/Drew claims that he can tell Sookie is reading his mind.
Meanwhile, Bill wakes up despite it being broad daylight, and Sam pulls up to the house. He sees Rene/Drew's blood and uses his weredog senses to track them, ripping off his shirt as he goes. Bill actually gets up and walks out into the daylight, which is really weird, because last time he thought Sookie was being killed by the same person in the same way, he stayed underground. He starts to fry in the sun.
Sookie hides in an open grave, which is so her, while Rene/Drew think-pretends to go back in the woods to look for her. She is totally fooled and starts to get up, but of course he's standing right behind her. Tip Number 2: If you do have mind-reading abilities, it is super useful not to let people know it. He gets a couple good punches in and starts to strangle her while an increasingly fried Bill zombie-walks towards them. It's Sam the collie who saves the day, knocking Rene down. Rene quickly gets the upper hand, and Sam shifts back to human once he's out. Rene is freaked out and takes a break from the strangling to kick and curse at an unconscious Sam. Bill steps into a patch of sunlight, starts frying more, and just manages to croak Sookie's name (which is good, because he's pretty unrecognizable by now) before falling down. Sookie comes to, spots a shovel, and uses it to knock down, then decapitate the bad guy, once again completely not using the telekinesis she displayed in the first couple episodes. The shovel falls down with a gross squishy sound.
In the distance, Bill's body continues to sizzle. Sookie rolls him over, exposing his face to the sun, and he actually manages to lift his head and apologize for his uselessness. Sam, on the other hand, has the presence of mind to pick him up and throw him into the open grave. He uses the very useful shovel to bury him.
Later, a bruised and drugged Sookie wakes up in her house in the presence of her friends. She tries to spill the beans about Sam's shapeshifting, but of course Tara and Lafayette assume it's the drugs talking. She continues to talk Sam up, and Tara looks uncomfortable. Arlene tromps in clumsily holding a bouquet, which she brandishes at Sookie while sobbing and squeaking. (Carrie Preston is pretty awesome in both this and her previous scene.)
Back at the police station, Sheriff Dearborne breaks the news to an blustering, indignant Andy that Rene/Drew is clearly the killer and not Jason. Andy surlily releases a surprised Jason.
Arlene is crying, pacing, apologizing to Sookie, and bemoaning her stupidity re: Rene/Drew. She begs Sookie to do a brain scan on her next beau. Finally, she asks about Bill, about whom Sookie is not optimistic. Despite the drugs, she breaks up.
Lafayette heads back to the bar, leaving Sam and Tara on the porch together. Sam mentions, pissily, that he left her five messages, and Tara says she never got them, so I guess the mute butler erased them, then gave her back her phone. Tara changes the subject and thanks him for saving Sookie. When he says he was worried about Tara, she dismisses it as he "worr[ies] about everybody," and I think she's trying to convey that she's relinquishing him to Sookie. She gives him a little kiss as Maryann pulls up in her red convertible. Tara briefly introduces them and gets in the car. Sam recognizes her, and asks what the hell she's doing there. Maryann responds evilly with "Did you think I wouldn't find you? Silly dog."
Back to Arlene, who alludes to Rene's odd proclivities in bed before Jason walks in, thrilling Sookie. He gives her a (painful) bear hug and trash talks Rene right in front of Arlene, who runs off. Jason looks slightly taken aback, but goes on to talk about being Saved and how he's meant to do something important with his life. Sookie, smiling, hope this means he's going to stay out of trouble. He claims he will, before running out, tripping over furniture along the way.
Lafayette takes out the trash, bitching about the bags other people have left lying around. Cleaning up, something rushes up out of the dark. Through the something's eyes, we see Lafayette freak out and jump up on the dumpster. The something gets very close very quickly before we abruptly cut away.
Sookie is still on her couch, watching a scene from The Little Princess in which Shirley Temple hugs her father and claims she knew he wasn't dead while the father sits there with a bandaged head and kind of looks like he has amnesia. The bell rings, and hooray, it's Bill, risen from the seeming dead. Faced by her joyful shock, he admits to having fed, which doesn't phase her in the slightest. She rescinds her rescinded invitation and they embrace. He goes to bite his wrist, but she refuses his super-healing blood, saying that after everything, she just needs "to feel human." This strikes me as a somewhat insensitive thing to say to a vampire, and indeed, he looks a bit taken aback, but maybe he's just thinking about the increased libido she won't be experiencing. He apologizes again for not saving her, which she of course does not hold him responsible for, and we have kissing. He gently kisses the bruises on her face, which is sweet, and then they go back to macking on each other. Looks like they're getting into it, so I presume Sookie has some rather painful sex.
The words "TWO WEEKS LATER" pop up; Merlotte's employees watch news coverage of Vermont legalizing human-vampire marriage (because gays are just like vampires.) Their eyes slide over to Sookie, and Arlene pokes her on the shoulder and teases that now she can marry Bill. Sookie demurs, and Sam, very cranky and snide, encourages her to marry Bill and notes how cheap the celebration would be without booze or food. Sookie storms off and Tara takes him to task, quoting Maryann in the process and thus pissing Sam off further. Sam asks if she's heard from her cousin, so I guess he's been eaten by the something from earlier (a big, supernatural pig, perhaps?). Tara is not too perturbed, since Lafayette's been known to run off before.
On the other end of the bar, Terry tries to chat up Arlene. First, he talks about how even when people disappear, "the good parts of them always stay put," which makes her smile. He strikes out, though, with "your hair's like a sunset after a bomb went off." Or at least, he seems to, but she giggles after he shamefacedly slinks away.
In a reasonably large church, a baby-faced preacher declares whatever Christians call jihad against vampires. We find Jason in the enthusiastic congregation, praising Jesus and kissing his neighbor, who is not a pretty girl.
Back at the bar, Tara tries to cut Andy off, but he incites a little sympathy in her, and she pours him another drink, calling it his "pity party." She then goes on about how it takes energy to hate people, blah blah blah. Kool-aid has been drunk.
Sookie serves Hoyt, who is looking kind of dapper and enquires after Bill. He expresses approval of their relationship and muses, only somewhat joking, on the possibility of finding a vampire girlfriend himself, perhaps through Bill. Sookie, probably considering Bill's female acquaintances, only laughs.
Bill plays a jaunty tune on a piano in his dark house, the door opens, but, much to his visible disappointment, it is not Sookie but his bratty "daughter," still bratty. Apparently, she is so very bratty that not even the incredibly repressive Eric and his female henchwoman (wearing a rather Jackie-O nubbly pale blue skirt suit, which is awesome) can manage her. They bare fangs over Sookie, henchwoman rolling her eyes, and Bill gets saddled with the brat. The brat bares her own fangs (the plasticky sound of which reminds me for the hundredth time of a Pez dispenser) and asks "who's good to eat around here." Bill looks tired.
Andy is drunk and doesn't want to give Sookie his keys. She consoles him a little and calls him "Detective Bellefleur," at which he perks up a bit. Meanwhile, Sam, looking very purposeful, transfers great stacks of money from a safe to a plastic bag. Sookie and Tara follow Andy to his car, still asking for his keys, which he says he left in his car. He finds his car stolen, but, kind of amusingly, Tara points it out just a little farther away. Of course, Andy grunts that that isn't where he left it, and it seems he's actually right, because now his car has a body in the back seat. Upon opening the back door, a black leg with painted toenails falls out, which means it's probably Lafayette. The ladies scream, which signals the end of the episode.
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